Ode to Wal-Mart

Oh, Wal-Mart…where do I begin?  I love Wal-Mart.  I have an aunt who works in administration at Target headquarters who would probably take me off of the Christmas card list if she saw this.  However, I feel it is high time I express my adoration for a place where I can buy a bale of toilet paper, house paint, engine oil, and tampons all in the same store!  Please understand that I really like my visits to Target (or Tar-jay Boutique as I usually refer to it), but I feel as though I am not as fulfilled after a Target trip as I am after a Wal-Mart excursion.

This Wal-Mart gene was passed down to me by my mother.  Growing up, my mom would take my sister and me to Wal-Mart, and we would spend HOURS strolling through the store making sure we did not forget anything on our list. Being that most of these stores take up several city blocks, it is not a shock that a shopping trip would take more than a few minutes.  Go in, grab what you need, and leave?  Completely out of the question.

When I moved to “God’s Country” I left behind not only my family, but a Wal-Mart that was about ten blocks from my house.  It was obviously difficult to leave my family
and dear friends, but I swear the most challenging adjustment was giving up the
convenience of super stores.  Now, the nearest major grocery store or drug store of any sort is almost two hours away.  So, in honor of my favorite shopping facility, here is a little poem.


Ode to Wal-Mart

Wal-Mart oh Wal-Mart how
I truly love thee

Leaving you in
Brookings was hard on me

Open 24 hours for
emergency things

Do you know the
simplicity that you bring?

Toilet paper,
tampons, oil, and beer

Hooray for Wal-Mart,
let’s give a cheer!

Minimum wage and no
benefits to boot?

You provide jobs for
many, so who gives a hoot?

I once had a teacher
who would never go in

Hating Wal-Mart in my
family is almost a sin

Great Value, Equate,
and even Sam’s Choice

If you love these brands,
let me hear your voice!

Need a haircut, a
mani, please have no fear

Don’t want to
socialize? Be your own cashier

The list could go on,
but I swear I’m not insane

In that special
little spot, Wal-Mart will remain

I hope you are having a blessed weekend despite the chilly
South Dakota weather today.

God Bless, The Displaced City Girl

One thought on “Ode to Wal-Mart

  1. Jaimie – Hillarious!! Now that we live in a city WITH a Walmart I don’t know how I survived for so long in Beresford!! 🙂 Have a wonderful weekend yourself!

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